Our Blog Posts will help you reach your full potential in becoming a confident conversationalist. New topics each week.
Surely you've seen the highlight by now. The final play of the NFL game between the Raiders and the Patriots. The one where New England was heading toward a win. It was almost guaranteed... until a huge mistake at the end of the game that result in an unlikely fumble recovery returned for a touchdown by the Las Vegas Raiders.Â
As a football fan, I couldn't believe the end of the game. That highlight will be shown for decades.Â
As a business owner, I see the potential for more conversations than just the outcome because I know mistakes happen, but they rarely happen in such a public way. The final play of that game was a HUGE mistake. Everyone at the game and on the field saw it. Millions of other people (fans and non fans alike) have seen the play. It wasn't just a mistake, it was a lack of fundamentals and there was a conversation after the game about accountability and who was responsible for the mistake and ultimately the loss.Â
In sports all of that gets talked about, usually...
Sports small talk can make it easier to have conversations about accountability with your team at work.Â
How? I'm glad you asked and I hope you're ready to think outside the box scores.Â
Conversations about accountability happen all the time on game days. They're called post-game interviews and listening with a close ear can help you take the stress out of initiating tough conversations at work.Â
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Athletes and coaches talk about how they talk about they exceeded expectations or failed to live up to their expectations and standards. The final score helps set the tone for those conversations, but they are a number of stats that support their assessments. With that in mind there are two things you need to do:
1. Know the numbers that measure success. Be specific. It's not pass/fail. If you want to move the needle and have impactful conversations about accountability know your numbers and why they're tied to success.Â
2. Use a local or regional team as an example and entry point ...
Timeouts, huddles, conversations in the dugout and suggestions from a caddy are all forms of feedback that happen during sporting events.Â
It's not just a break in the action, those conversations are critical for making adjustments, staying on track and being successful. When you think about it that way, it's easier to think out side the box scores and borrow a few conversation tactics from sports.Â
As the video points out, it's absurd to think that a coach will withhold critical feedback until the end of the season or even the midway point of the season. So why would you do that with your team at work?Â
Instead of dragging out the process or delaying conversations about feedback until it's time for mid-year reviews or yearly performance reviews, let's use sports to help accelerate the feedback process. When you see a time out called, a team huddle or a coach yell, you're watching feedback in action and this is what you're seeing:
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Think about it this in terms of your performance review or year-end reviews. The ultimate measure of success is meeting or exceeding a goal, but that's not the only way to measure growth, lessons learned and skills you obtained or strengthened.Â
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There is value in measuring forward progress. You see it every week during football games. This is one of the ways to think outside the box scores and find parallels between sports and business.Â
If it feels like you move one step forward and then two steps back, only count the step forward. It's called forward progress. Â
Every week I'm posting a new video on You Tube to encourage Thinking Outside the Box Scores. You can find those videos here and subscribe to be among the first to see them.Â
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If the last thing you want to do after finishing a project is a debrief, I get it.
I’m not particularly fond of re-watching past TV shows/segments I’ve produced. When I’m done, I’m done and I’m ready to move on. Except that’s not a game plan for success. Sports gives us a great example and reminder of that.
As the sideline reporter for the Seattle Seahawks I can tell you that every Monday is “Tell the Truth Monday” at the Seahawks facility. Everyone reviews film, (Yes, I know it’s not actual film, but they still call it film study.) They highlight the successes, study the failed plays and have honest conversations about what went right and what went wrong because the film, as they say, doesn’t lie. I’ve covered more than 250 games for the Seahawks, including outcomes you don’t want to talk about much less re-live on Monday, but they do it anyway because it’s one of the ways you get better.
Let’s bring this back to business. NFL teams have weekly projects. We call them games, but ...
There is a difference between saying "I was wrong" and "I'm sorry." Both are important, but you don't necessarily need to apologize if you guessed wrong or your educated guess didn't pan out.
I was completely wrong about how the Seahawks game in Germany would play out. It gave me the perfect opportunity to practice useful communication skill in business.Â
As I mentioned in the video there are times an apology is necessary, but I've seen far too many people (especially women I've worked with) default to "I'm sorry." Here's what happens when you do that:Â you take on unnecessary blame and criticism, add pressure on yourself and send a message that you're responsible for any and all failures. That's just not true and it doesn't position you well for future opportunities.Â
Here's where sports can help us differentiate between "I was wrong" and "I'm sorry." It starts with the question "Who do you think will win the game?" The answer is a best guess and fans get it wrong all the time.
...Could you imagine having a performance review every week?
Or having to talk about every outcome (good and bad) your team produced in a week?
Even worse, could you imagine pointing out shortcomings and pointing out the losers in the group?Â
Sounds a little cringy in a business setting doesn’t it?
But as sports fans we do these things all. the. time. It's called cheering. It’s how we talk about games. It’s the criticism we dish out after a disappointing loss when we don’t have any problem calling out the player whose slump is bringing down the rest of the team.
As sports fans, we’re not only capable of delivering feedback we excel at it. And then we clam up when we encounter similar conversations in business. We dread performance reviews. We shy away from tough conversations. We avoid critical feedback.
Here are a few gentle reminders of what sports fans already know:
Feedback is both expected and obvious in sports. The dropped ball, costly error, missed free throws... it's obvi...
Hard work pays off, but it doesn’t necessarily speak for itself. You have to be able to articulate your value because the answer to the question: “Doesn’t the company know how hard I work?” is “Probably not.”
Advocating for yourself starts with your communication skills. You don’t need to brag about what you’ve accomplished, but you do need to realize that everyone (including your manager, CEO, Founder, etc…) is busy. As long as a job is getting done no one looks too closely at the effort behind how it got done.Â
It’s on you to articulate how you affected the outcome.Â
As you can tell in the video I get very passionate talking about this particular communication skill. There are a lot of things out my control, but I can always control my messaging and the way I talk about my value and success.Â
If you struggle talking about your successes I get it. My parents taught me that you didn’t need to tell anyone how hard you worked because hard work would get noticed. In a corporate set...
"What was he thinking?"
"How could the team be so bad?"
"What the heck happened in that game?"
Every sports fan asks questions like these. It's part of being a fan and debating decisions is one way to talk about a game, but not every one wants to dialogue and discuss what happened. Sometimes fans want to vent about a call they hated or a disappointing outcome.
Venting is different than dialogue. There's a place for both, but it's helpful if you share that objective at the beginning of the conversation.
As a sports broadcaster who's in the clubhouse and talking to coaches and managers about the decisions that get made, I can offer insight and have a conversation about why things happened in a game. But that's not helpful if I'm talking to someone who just wants to vent. Telling me at the outset of the exchange saves time and prevents a lot of frustration. In fact, being clear on your objective in a conversations you have with friends, family and colleagues does the same thin...
We are a quarter of the way through the NFL season. If you’re not already a fan, now is a great time to get on board. What’s in it for you? Multiple relationship building opportunities in business.
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